


My answer is you...

by Aholic_Happiness



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-20
Updated: 2018-05-20
Packaged: 2019-05-09 13:14:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14716745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aholic_Happiness/pseuds/Aholic_Happiness
Summary: "Even if it hurts, it's alright, because I love you."





	My answer is you...

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!   
> Before you start reading, just let me tell you this is my first real work in English and that English is not my native language so don't hesitate and feel free to correct any mistake you might find. And the most important thing: feedbacks are always welcomed and appreciated (or should I say even more: they are loved by authors/writers)!   
> Enjoy! ♡

“Hey, you’re okay?” Yukhei slowly raised his head. This simple gest caused him a sudden pain inside his body, crawling into his heart. “Yeah, just a stupid headache though, don’t worry” He answered with a smile. Hopefully, the boy went back to his notes and didn’t bother him any longer.

As the course went by, a boy entered the room and went to his seat without bothering or disturbing any of the students. His enters made his heart flustered and sunk at the same time. A new thorn appeared, stinging with a pain he was used to.

He loved this pain, he craved it each time he laid his eyes on the boy or hear his mesmerizing voice. The more he still thought about him, the more this pain became smooth as the blood in his veins.

“You should get surgery Xuxi! You can’t go on and suffer like this!” His friend said to him one day, sick of seeing him throwing flowers again and again and again — which meant every day, since their high school years.

He can’t. He doesn’t want to get rid of it. He just can’t. Because it means that his feelings for Mark will disappear. It means he will no longer feel this wonderful and incredible love for this amazing, brilliant and marvelous boy. And this, this will be the most unbearable thing. He prefers to die rather feel his love murdered. He prefers to suffocate because of his feelings rather than let it wither.

He wants his love to be timeless. He wants his love to remain eternal.

Even though flowers wilt, he thought, bitter. But his love isn’t going to wither, he promised to himself. Even in the death, he will love Mark and protect him from any harm.

“Wanna walk home together?” Mark asked him, a beautiful smile on his lips. Yukhei loved when he smiles or when he’s happy because his eyes sparkle with a billion stars and it was the most beautiful thing he has ever witnessed.

Without an ounce of hesitation, the tall boy yelled an excited yes to him, jumping from his seat, before enveloping a tender arm around Mark ‘shoulders. “Let’s goooo~” Yukhei shouted. “Woooowoo” Mark screamed back, his arms in the air.

Lucas laughed along with the adorable boy. The thorns stung through his heart, creeping under his skin. They electrified his whole being, lighting this relentless and eternal fire inside his lungs and heart, both burning slowly, bleeding to death.

Yukhei coughed multiple times but he succeeded to swallowed back the poison that he had threatened to throw up. His tongue and mouth were filled with blossomed blood.

“Do you catch a cold?” Mark finally asked him, obviously worried about Lucas’ well-being. “What are you saying? I’m fine! Nothing can stop me!” Lucas took his loudest voice he could, beating up his painful throat and discarding this dreadful sensation.

Yukhei kept coughing but he never let Mark know anything about his condition. However, he was wondering if he could tell him his feelings towards him, at least for the first and last time.

Should he tell him that he loves him?

Should he tell him how much he means for him? how much he loves his smile, his laugh, the stars in his eyes, the cute way he sticks his tongue? how much he loves his everything and his soul?

Should he tell him that he is his world and universe and any words would never ever depict and express his love for him?

Soon they arrived in front of Mark’s home. “Thanks for walking me home Xuxi!” Mark said, already opening the entrance door. “Don’t get lost” Yukhei joked and Mark laughed a last time. “Goodbye Lucas” Yukhei lost his smile for a second or two, it came back quickly. This simple word meant so many things he didn’t have the courage to say out loud. This simple word was filled with so much sorrow that he was so close to break down in front of the light of his life.

“ _Goodbye_ ”

➼ . . . . ♡

 

His hands grabbed the side of the sink. Blood was dripping from his mouth and he knew that it wasn’t going to stop until his last breath.

The thorns were brutal, a lot more than usual. They stung his lungs — he threw up. They stung his heart — a new poisoned wave came from his mouth and filled the sink, half full.

His answer was the same than before.

The roots, stronger than ever, constricted his lungs, as if they were snakes wrapped around their prey. And they were ready to put an end to it.

His answer remained the same.

He threw up again — and again — and again.

His mind was full of images and thoughts involving one single person.

Even now, he doesn’t regret. Even now, he still thinks it was the best thing that ever happened to him.

Even now, while the roots are choking him, and he is trying to reach for his breath. Even now, when he is throwing up every single flower blossomed with his love, he can’t think that this love was a mistake.

So, if he had ever the choice to do it again, he would choose the same path.

“My answer is you… It would always be you.”

His vision was blurry, lighting and black points dancing all around his view.

His respiration stopped. His blossomed heart froze.

Darkness enveloped his vision as well as his mind.

The last flower dropped from his mouth.

“ _I love you Lee Minhyung_ ”


End file.
